Monthly Archives May 2012


Today’s it’s time for an installment of an old column I used to write from a few years back that I’ve decided to start up again. If you like this, click over in the categories for the category entitled: DOTS & DASHES, and you can see all of the Q&A stuff without having to sort through my personal blog posts (this is the only one as of 5/5, but give me time, and there’ll be more!)

Today, we tackle in DOTS & DASHES some of the most frequently asked questions by freelance writers, particularly those who are learning to write for web content versus print, and some of their questions as new freelance writers. We hope these Q&As will be most helpful, and I present them here for your edification (no, Gregg, that doesn’t mean you get to eat something).



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Useful or Beautiful

“If it’s not useful or beautiful, get rid of it!”

I once took a class about personal empowerment and that is the phrase we were told. We were informed to look around our homes and to clean up the clutter. We were told, “If it’s not useful or beautiful, get rid of it!”

I decided that’s not a bad way to live your life all the way around, and I’m not meaning about just ‘things’ either.

Take your thoughts and your self-talk. Think about how much happier would we all be if the only thoughts we had and the only feelings we allowed into our experience were those thoughts and feelings that were either ‘useful or beautiful.’

Now, we all have memories—some good, some bad, based on our perceptions of the memories. We can all agree that some things we once thought were bad really were important or ‘useful’ to us in the long run. Sometimes these seemingly negative things in our lives are things we can learn from, grow from, and let them change us or our lives in positive ways.

I read something recently that said, “Suffering is just the mind and body’s way of showing you an error in thinking.”

I agree with this...

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I Trust You

“I trust you.” I never knew how important those three words were.

…I trust you.

More important than saying I love you is knowing that in a relationship there is trust.

The only thing missing from some of my past relationships was that one crucial ingredient.


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What is Making Love, Really?

Contrary to popular belief, making love really has very little to do with sex.

No, in fact, making love doesn’t really require sex at all. Although, adding sex to making love can really bring two powerful parts of loving together into a relationship, and that is the ultimate goal when in love with someone.

But right now, I want to talk about ‘making love’ and what exactly that is, at least, what it is to me.


Making love is a ...

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Yes, We Dance

(*Originally written in 2006. Well worth revisiting this one.)

The dance was nice. The music was great, but a little loud. It was very hot on the dance floor, but we found a personal wind tunnel near the entrance where we sat to cool us down.

And there on the dance floor was this early to mid-20s woman, wearing jeans and a white shirt, with what appeared to be her husband and two children.

They were dancing together as a family. At one point, she even got on her knees to dance with her less than three-year-old son while dad swung the daughter around and around.

I watched, entranced by the love and fun in this little family unit. They made me smile, filled my heart with joy.

Then, while I was sitting at this table watching them, this song comes on, this Natural Woman song.

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Do you lurk in the shadows watching me?

I am so exposed.

I put everything out there, hoping you will see, will read me, will view me—will watch me and know how I feel, how I still feel.

Open, my life is a book, written on pages before you, and everyone can read it, read me. Part of me hopes you are watching and part of me is so afraid of what you might see.

You are invisible to me. All traces of a connection that was once so real and strong to me—gone. I seek for it; I yearn for it. I reach out and can almost touch it, almost feel it, and then it vanishes like smoke before my eyes.

I don’t cry. I don’t get angry. I’m not sad. I’m just barely breathing, barely holding on to that thin string that is sanity and dangerously close to stepping over the line into the realm of fantasy forevermore—drifting into fitful sleep each night.

Even in my dreams, I ca...

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