The other day, I was reading a blog post about someone who put up a gay pride flag on their flagpole of their house. The homeowner’s association was contacted by several other residents, who were complaining about the flag and wanting the homeowner to take it down. The homeowner’s association couldn’t do anything about it, because there was nothing in the HOA bylaws that made it against the rules to fly that flag–or really, any flag–on their own property.
One of the residents wrote to the HOA, and here is what he or she had to say:
[They]…have had their ‘gay pride’ flag up for six to eight weeks. The flag has two wedding rings interlocked and many rainbow-colored stripes. It is an eyesore. In my opinion, it is okay to feel strongely [sic] about a cause. But to leave their ‘political statement’ up for this long is ridiculous, and I am offended. Most people do not choose the gay lifestyle, and personally, it irritates me to have to be reminded every day of two men having sex with each other. It’s not a fun thing to look at as I come and go every day. If someone left their sign up regarding an election for more than a week or two, it would get very old and be an eyesore.
I couldn’t help myself. I burst out laughing so hard when I read this. There is so much wrong with this quote, I don’t even know where to begin. Let’s look at the easy stuff first.
There is NOTHING offensive about bright rainbow colors. I find it amusing this person assumes that all gay people are men–there are gay women. Yes, it happens. I like the ‘most people do not choose to be gay’. Yes, this is true–sometimes, usually, even gay people don’t choose to be gay (though arguably, some people DO choose to live a gay lifestyle and some people do not choose to live a gay lifestyle)… no one actually chooses to BE gay. You either are or you are not gay. Coming out, living as a gay person, acting on your feelings and desires, all that is secondary and all that is a choice–just like it is for any straight person out there. But BEING gay is no more a choice than being born is a choice.
Next, there is nothing offensive about rings interlocking.It might be a symbol that means marriage to some people–to other people, it might just be two rings. Nothing offensive there. But let’s assume it DOES mean marriage to someone–no one said it had to be GAY marriage. Marriage is marriage. Marriage isn’t a person and thus marriage cannot be gay or straight–marriage is just marriage. The people involved, the parties who get married, that is another story.
But the big one for me on this that makes me laugh the most, is the part about the sex… marriage does NOT mean sex. In fact, isn’t the running joke about marriage that once you get married, the sex stops anyway? So seeing two wedding bands, the symbol of marriage, apparently makes this person think of sex.
But not just ANY sex. It specifically makes this person think of TWO MEN HAVING SEX WITH EACH OTHER, every day.
Now, this person, who lives in your neighborhood, cannot drive by a house with a flag in front without picturing two gay men having sex with each other, every day… but the gay people are the problem?
I mean, who’s the bigger pervert here, The people who want to marry the person they are in love with and commit to sharing their lives together, or the person who can’t drive by a flag without picturing naked, sweaty, heaving musclebound gay guys going at it?
When people write things like this, do they just not think it through? Oh, never mind… ‘thinking’. That’s the problem. Not enough of that going on.
So yeah, some people have heard me say I am not a political person, and then when I come out in favor of and supporting of gay rights and gay marriage, they ask me, “Isn’t that a political stance?” My answer is no. It’s not a political stance at all. It’s about humanity. It’s a social thing.
It’s a love thing.
In my book, we need more love in the world, and I’m pretty okay with it being more gay love. Love is love. Regardless of gender, regardless of culture, regardless of ethnicity, regardless of race, regardless of socio-economic levels, regardless of nationality–love doesn’t really look all that different no matter who is sharing it. Love transcends borders, color, language and yes, gender.
Some people are gay. Get over it.
Love and stuff,